You Know It's Time To Wise Up When . . .

[Jamie]

The judge tells you this:

"You're not going to make it in prison," the judge said. "You're too young, not big enough and you look like a girl," he told the boy, whose long brown hair was partially bleached.

[Jamie]

Oh, this one's an even better Darwin Award nominee:

When DPD responded to calls for help, Johnson reappeared unarmed and dressed in different clothing from what witnesses described. He opened the patrol car’s passenger door and demanded the officer’s weapon and police car, Watson said.